The Bench

The place is becoming dark; just like her life. The Sunset is happening slowly making way for the Moonlight to spread itself across the space. No matter how many times she thinks about her situation, she is unable to find any solution. The bench on the bridge where she is sitting is becoming cold. The breeze blowing from the side of the river started producing chill effect. The vibrant river, which so far reflected strong golden Sun’s rays into the sky, is getting engulfed by the twilight darkness. The bridge side lights were switched on automatically by the embedded sensors. She has been observing all these changes sitting there and told herself how things change just in a matter of minutes without anyone’s interference as if they were following someone’s instructions. 

Saki is working as a manager in an IT company. Collecting IOT wearables has become one of her hobbies nowadays. In her heart she knows very well that it is not her hobby but Rithvik’s. Just to show everything is normal, she made that as her hobby.  Actually, she is still trying to accept that as her hobby in her heart.  After she married Rithvik, she has been doing her best to change her; in fact changes her tastes, mindset, and her way of life. However, somewhere in the process she is losing the game; means, she is losing the inspiration to change herself. Life suddenly has become a heavyweight, which she cannot carry it so far. If she has to live life of her choice, she has to dump this weight. But then, to lead the life she wants, she wants to return to her previous life; that life before her marriage. She wants that freedom, follow those days mindset, and interact with those friends whom she was interested in. 

Yes! Friends! Actually, they are more than friends. They want to lead a life of their own. They are like two parallel lines occasionally meet each other whenever they need other’s presence in their life; otherwise, they are on their own and never interfere in each other’s lives. This mechanism worked for them from the time they met each other. Sagar is his name and he was her boyfriend. A happy go lucky guy, with his simple living and high thinking way of life used to attract everyone. If she wants to enjoy at any moment those days, the default address for her was Sagar. Really, he has a sea-size heart when it comes to comforting his near and dear ones and a burning Sun like passion to get things done. A smart, handsome looking, balanced, and passionate guy who has the capability to focus on things that others’ think has good potential to further his career.

But, what happened then? Nothing! Sagar is not in emotional relation with anyone Saki knows; including her. It is she who has been thinking about her love with Sagar. It is she who used to dream about Sagar. She was the one who used to celebrate his birthdays, throw surprise parties at her own expense, and dream about him as her lover. But from Sagar’s side, she was one of his close friends. That’s all! His focus was never on her. He is very much into his own professional stuff which helps him to further his career. In other words, she never received emotional response from Sagar. And then, she got married to Rithvik.

Sagar attended their marriage and congratulated them. Even at that moment, she could not find any emotional reaction in his eyes. When Rithvik entered her life, she was confused after encountering a different personality altogether. Rithvik is more serious type. He is not like Sagar, who is always jovial and approachable. Rithvik goes by process; he needs to know everything in advance before he starts any activity. Saki likes unpredictability. She likes thrill. She wants that ‘kick’ in everything whatever she does which Sagar used to give her in tons. From Rithvik, she cannot expect any of these things. He is like a rock. 

Yes, rock! He is Mr. Dependable. Actually, it is with Rithvik she shared a lot of her emotions. It is him who gave her a helping hand whenever she needs it without asking any questions. He gave her so many suggestions to overcome the obstacles in her career. It was him who looked after her parents when she was busy with her career. Then why she wants to go away from Rithvik? Why she is unable to bear him now? It is because today Sagar joined her company and he is her boss now. After seeing him and shaking hands with him, the irresistible irrepressible impulsive ‘old flame’ reignited in her. Although Sagar’s behavior has not changed since she saw him last time, changes started happening in her heart and mind since this afternoon. Suddenly, Saki started realizing what she lost all these days after she met Sagar. Her original ‘thrill-seeking’ attitude suddenly became strong enough to reject her current marriage life and seek freedom from all the bondings she got tied up with. At that moment, she never thought of Rithvik. Actually, Rithvik, her husband, is looking like a villain now. Saki’s mind started telling her that is because of Rithvik in her life that she lost all her happiness. But, her heart started murmuring something in a very low decibel voice that she is happy with whom she is right now. 

One forceful chill breeze from her backside brought Saki to her senses. It is almost 8 pm now. She never realized how much time passed by sitting and introspecting about her life. And exactly at that moment, a beggar came to her asking alms. He looks like that he is in his sixties. He is walking very slowly with the help of a long stick. A few feet away from him, one more beggar looking lady who again in her sixties is standing shivering due to the cold weather. The man came to Saki and begged her for a few rupees so that he can buy a blanket for his wife. ‘Is she really your wife?’ Saki questioned him. For that, he slowly nodded his head saying ‘Yes’. How long have you been married? Saki asked. The beggar replied ‘nearly 45 years’. Saki opened her purse and took a 50 Rs./- note. ‘Are you begging since your childhood?’ she asked holding the note in her hand. ‘No’ the beggar replied. I used to do business. We lead a good life until my sons took over my business and pushed us outside. ‘Hmm…’ Saki said. The beggar continued: She is my wife. I need to look after her until my last minute. I might not have given enough comforts to her to keep her happy throughout her life but I did my best. Even today she does not like so many things about me. But, she still loves me and vice-versa. Life never goes by as per our expectations. We need to go by its commands.’ Saki gave the note. 

The beggar saluted and left the place.Saki realized now that her life has changed and there is no point in looking back at the past episodes of life. She needs to take the new challenges in life head on and drive her toward success. Rithvik might not be perfect but he is a good human being. It is not good to expect that the glass should be filled up to its brim always. There are situations in life where it is better to keep the glass ‘half-full’. At the moment, she is facing that ‘half-glass’ situation in life. Now, she got confidence after realizing that she found the ropes of her life. A slight smile flashed on her face. She looked at her watch and told her that it is time to go home and prepare food. ‘Let me impress you Rithvik with my cooking today’ she told herself, started her car, and started driving toward home.